Heath's Blog


Funny Showing Instructions

I had to throw my head back and laugh at this one. WYSIWYG pictures and hilarious showing instructions make this one good for a giggle. The house is in an estate.  The contents are strewn throughout, the landscaping hasn't been maintained, and the building needs a BIG hug (TLC).

What made me laugh are the showing instructions that are for other agents and brokers: "Call us to let us know you're going in case we need to send out a search party." The public description is pretty clear for buyers, too.  "Why so cheap? Well here's the bad news: It needs lots of work and is overgrown and is therefore priced at lot value. There's lots of rotted trim, mold and other creepy stuff and the lucky new owner gets the property strictly as is which includes clutter out of a scene from some hoarders TV show (there might just be a treasure under there somewhere!) No record of any septic work ever being done. If you're game for a challenge this just could be the bargain you've been waiting for."

At least he is straight forward from the start!


Heath Coker, Associate Broker
Robert Paul Properties
www.CapeGroup.com / capegroup@capegroup.com
508-274-5613  Licensed in MA
Its a beautiful day on Cape Cod!
@CapeGroup  Skype: heath.coker

REindex.com, The Site Engine®
508-274-5613  reindex@reindex.com
See our 2 Minute YouTube www.REindex.com/WhatIsREindex.html

James Heath Coker | Create Your Badge


Too funny! You wonder what kind of client relationship allows him to be so flippant??!!

Posted by Holly Weatherwax, A Great Real Estate Experience ( Associate Broker, Momentum Realty) over 9 years ago

Well, this beats the remarks that make you think a property is pristine and then when you arrive to show it fits this description...

Posted by Nancy Conner, Olympia/Thurston County WA over 9 years ago

I'll just bet that he generated a LOT of interest with that description. Just like a train wreck, you can't help but to look! LOl!!!

Posted by Vanessa Calhoun, Your Greater Atlanta Marketing Guru!! (PalmerHouse Properties & Associates, LLC) over 9 years ago


This does not sound exactly appealing but could be a great draw for people who are looking for a steal.  From that description there had better be some flexibility in the price.


Posted by Claudette Millette, Buyer, Broker - Metrowest Mass (The Buyers' Counsel) over 9 years ago

Sounds like someone is going to have a lot of work ahead.

Posted by Kevin Henry (Henry Realty) over 9 years ago

Applauds and kudos for the first truth in advertising I've seen in a listing!!

Posted by Carla Muss-Jacobs, RETIRED (RETIRED / State License is Inactive) over 9 years ago

That's very funny and sure to get peoples' attention.  Thanks for sharing Heath!

Posted by Karen Rice Madison AL Realtor, 256-348-1527 Call/Text (Keller Williams Realty Madison) over 9 years ago

Kudos....tell it like it is......

Posted by Richie Alan Naggar, agent & author (people first...then business Ran Right Realty ) over 9 years ago

Too Funny! Wow I thought I had a doosy come up to list.  But this one takes the cake.

Posted by MeLisa Minter, Realtor, Bay Area Houston Real Estate Agent (Minter Real Estate Services) over 9 years ago

Truth in Advertising!  It's good to laugh, even at yourself.  I'm sure the heirs are happy not to have to go through it all.

Posted by Dan Tabit (Keller Williams Bellevue) over 9 years ago

I love telling it like it is!  I now know that there are worse listings out there than any of mine.  Thanks for the chuckle on a rainy day!

Posted by Karen Feltman, Relocation Specialist in Cedar Rapids, Iowa (Cedar Rapids/Iowa City, IA KW Legacy Group) over 9 years ago

I love it! 

All these "house needs work, but has great potential" are getting boring, and I have an impression that potentially interested people just click away really quick...

Maybe we all should start adding little pizzaz to our ads? "have the biggest house on the street - be envy of all neighbors!" or something like that... 

Posted by Anna Tolstoy (Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage) over 9 years ago

So funny!  I'll bet this will have people looking if not buying!  I know those estate sales with lots of "digger" boxes advertised draw in tons of people!  Thanks for the laugh!

Posted by Valerie Baker, Spokane Realtor (Exit Real Estate Professionals) over 9 years ago

Applause for both the honesty and the humor. Reminds me of Southwest Airlines safety talk before a flight.

Posted by Glenn Roberts (Retired) over 9 years ago

Heath - I love it and honestly would probably go take a look just out of curiousity.  I showed a house recently that followed its description and mention of 'needs some work' with "Good Luck!".  I chuckled for quite awhile on that one and appreciated the listing agent's concern for my safety (which was not unwarranted!).

Posted by Dee Bundy, Helping You Make Colorado "Home" (Fort Collins Realtor @ C3 Real Estate Solutions) over 9 years ago

I enjoyed, the sense of humor the agent had, and thankfully the agent did not sugar coat the truth.

Posted by Lorraine or Loretta Kratz, Certified Negotiation Consultants (Crescent Moon Realty, Inc. & Land N Sea Auctions.) over 9 years ago

I'd love to see more descriptions like that.  Tell it like it is, maintain a sense of humor, and get it sold so the heirs can get on with their lives.  Fabulous!

Posted by Kim Brown, Keene, NH - New England at its Best! (Keller Williams Realty) over 9 years ago

Heath - Now That's full disclosure if I've ever seen it.... Funny and honest..... Good one....

Posted by Robert and Lisa Hammerstein -201-315-8618, Bergen County NJ Real Estate (Keller Williams Valley Realty) over 9 years ago

Heath, I think thats the best description I have seen yet.

Posted by Ted Tyndall, I will help You find the Home YOU want to Buy (Davidson Realty Inc.) over 9 years ago

LOL no puffing here!

might need a mask to tour it though ;0

thanks for sharing Heath - made me chuckle



Posted by Jeff&Grace Safrin, SpousesSellingHousesTM (F.C.Tucker 1st Team Real Estate) over 9 years ago

Hi Heath~  You have to admit it will draw some attention!  Besides that, it is the truth too!

Posted by Vickie McCartney, Broker, Real Estate Agent Owensboro KY (Maverick Realty) over 9 years ago

I love it! It's a lot better than "some TLC needed".

Posted by Sandy Nelson, your Olympia area Realtor (Riley Jackson Real Estate Inc.) over 9 years ago

If it's priced right, people will appreciate the honesty and it will move quickly.  You can't put lipstick on a pig...

David in Boston

Posted by David Cahill (Century 21 Cahill Associates) over 9 years ago

Oh my gosh!  I LOVE IT!  I try to spice up my Realtor Remarks section to create a little smile or at least make us all feel human.  I'd call that agent just to tell him I love his remarks...even if I didn't show his listing!  Too fun!

Posted by Amy Jones Group, 4 Time BEST OF OUR VALLEY Winner (South East Valley - www.AmyJonesGroup.com) over 9 years ago

Fun!  I enjoy reading the odd listing that has the agent's personality!  I remember when I used to live in Georgia, there was an agent that often used the phrase "shows like a pig with lipstick" on his listings.  Loved it!

Posted by Marie Haydock, Simplifying Real Estate (Evergreen Global Homes & Land | RSVP Real Estate) over 9 years ago

That's awesome. I wish more listing agents would tell us the truth, or closer to it, before we take our clients to the homes.

Posted by Eric Michael, Metro Detroit Real Estate Professional 734.564.1519 (Remerica Integrity, Realtors®, Northville, MI) over 9 years ago

Ok this is too funny~!!!!

Posted by Dawn Maloney, 330-990-4236 Hudson & Northeastern Ohio (RE/MAX Trinity Northeast Ohio Real Estate Specialist) over 9 years ago

Much better a funny and truthful description than a serious one that misrepresents the property...

Posted by Lane Bailey, Realtor & Car Guy (Century 21 Results Realty) over 9 years ago

ROTFL...I like it!  It sure beats virtually staging this one, doesn't it?  I'd show it just to see how horrible it truly is!

Posted by Elizabeth Cooper-Golden, Huntsville AL MLS (Huntsville Alabama Real Estate, (@ Homes Realty Group)) over 9 years ago

So did you preview it?

Posted by Mark Hitz (Keller Williams ) over 9 years ago

I hope that guy is a blogger.  He's a natural.

Posted by Patsy Overton (Patsy Overton Interiors, Atlanta, Georgia) over 9 years ago

Heath - That is telling it like it is.

Posted by Ken Barker Realtor® GRI, E-Pro Certified (Dilbeck Real Estate) over 9 years ago

Heath - it's refreshing to hear that given how many times we'd like to rewrite our own description of a property after viewing it.  It sure beats "handyman special"...

Posted by Rob Albertson (Realty Austin) over 9 years ago

This looks just like the type of property that an investor would be interested in.  Actually, pretty clever marketing.

Posted by Tammie White, Broker, Franklin TN Homes for Sale (Franklin Homes Realty LLC) over 9 years ago

That's pretty good - Particularly the bit about search parties...at least the listing wasn't "enhanced" with fake photos!

Posted by Ruthmarie Hicks (Keller Williams NY Realty - 120 Bloomingdale Road #101, White Plains NY 10605) over 9 years ago

How clever really.....one thing is for sure....he has a unique approach that sticks with you...or is that the crud under foot...LOL

Posted by Lori Churchill Cofer, Realtor - 509-330-0086 - Pullman, WA (Beasley Realty) over 9 years ago

OK Heath - Now this is very funny - Sounds like they are marketing in a way to just get foot traffic out the see this one. :)

Posted by Roland Woodworth, Q Realty - Power In Real Estate (Q Realty) over 9 years ago

AWESOME!  I wish all showing instructions were this honest!!  I guess there are no worries about 'disclosure' here...?

Posted by Jennifer Prestwich, Madison & Co Properties (Henderson, Thornton, Broomfield and Westminster) over 9 years ago

This is funny.  At least you don't have to pick through the puffery to the reality.

Posted by Christine Donovan, Broker/Attorney 714-319-9751 DRE01267479 - Costa M (Donovan Blatt Realty) over 9 years ago

Would it be that more listings were so truthful -- there are so many that say things like "view" and you go there and wonder what on earth they were thinking.

Posted by Bob & Carolin Benjamin, East Phoenix Arizona Homes (Benjamin Realty LLC) over 9 years ago

That tops any I have seen here.  The agent does have a sense of humor.

Posted by Elite Home Sales Team, A Tenacious and Skilled Real Estate Team (Elite Home Sales Team OC) over 9 years ago

Truth in advertising - gotta love it!

Posted by Kathy Kenney, Realtor - Princeton & Central NJ Homes for Sale (Keller Williams, Princeton, NJ) over 9 years ago

Heath that is one of the better descriptions I have ever heard! Is there too much truth...only the seller would know:)

Posted by Bill Gassett, Metrowest Massachusetts Real Estate (RE/MAX Executive Realty) over 9 years ago

Very funny!  I am one of your Re-Bloggers. Thank you.

Most sellers would put the kabash on such truthiness.

Posted by Maureen McCabe, Columbus Ohio Real Estate (HER Realtors) over 9 years ago

I wonder how most agents would have written this description.

Posted by Gary Burleson, Myrtle Beach Homes, Condos, Foreclosures, Investment Propery (Beach Water Realty - www.beachwaterrealty.com) over 9 years ago

I like the brutally honest description and would love to see more agents use this approach, although most sellers probably wouldn't allow it. I would be curious to see what kind of reaction the agent gets.

Posted by Dan and Amy Schuman, Luxury Home Specialists (Howard Hanna Real Estate Services) over 9 years ago

The honesty and humor are sure to entice that buyer looking for a deal.  We all know that "needs a little TLC", "build equity with your sweat", "handymans dream" all mean the same thing...so why not just say it!  Thanks for sharing and KUDOS to the author!

Posted by Connie Johns, Toledo, Ohio Area Real Estate (Transaction Realty) over 9 years ago

Hi Heath,  Don't know about you but this ad would be a sure fire attraction for me.  I like the candid nature coupled with a dry sense of humor !

Posted by Bill Gillhespy, Fort Myers Beach Realtor, Fort Myers Beach Agent - Homes & Condos (16 Sunview Blvd) over 9 years ago

Hilarious, made me laugh too.  I have shown a few listings like that and I did not have the warning first.  Kudos to the agent for being honest!!!

Posted by Lesley Wagstaff, For Real Estate and Mortgages (Re/Max Results Realty in Vancouver, BC) over 9 years ago

Back when I was flipping properties, that would have piqued my interest and I would have headed right over there.

Posted by Russel Ray, San Diego Business & Marketing Consultant & Photographer (Russel Ray) over 9 years ago

Too funny. I just wrote a blog about not enough information on listings. Now I read this.

Posted by Phil Cogan (Coldwell Banker Residential Real Estate) over 9 years ago

Well at least he told the truth and didn't raise any unrealistic expectations.

Posted by Bernadine Hunter, SFR, ACRE, "Finding Solution to Your Real Estate Needs" (Keller Williams Greater Columbus Realty) over 9 years ago

This is great! Loved it. Thanks for sharing, Heath!

Posted by Ally Wangsness - Seattle Real Estate Broker (RE/MAX Metro Realty, Inc.) over 9 years ago

And you know what else?  It is just what someone else is looking for.  You just have to find that person!

Posted by Evelyn Johnston, The People You Know, Like and Trust! (Friends & Neighbors Real Estate) over 9 years ago

Heath - Did you show the property and live to tell about it? You seem to be MIA... is everything okay? Hello.... quick, somebody call the search party!!!! LOL

Posted by Judy Jennings, Broker - The Lanterns at Warren Woods - Ashland MA (The Green Company) over 9 years ago

I, too, am at a loss for those comments.  I guess he was counting on a 50/50 response to sell.

Posted by Latonia Parks, Certified Military Relocation Expert (Top Bragg Realty, Fayetteville NC, Home of the 82d ABN DIV) over 9 years ago

I'm still here.....  grin  : )

Posted by Associate Broker Falmouth MA Cape Cod Heath Coker, Heath Coker Robert Paul Properties Falmouth MA (http://www.CapeGroup.com & http://www.REindex.com) over 9 years ago

"AS IS" For sure. Thanks for a not so boring description with all the "puffery" taken out.

Posted by Larry Lawfer, "I listen for a living." It's all about you. (YourStories Realty Group powered by Castles Unlimited®) over 9 years ago